Sweet Relief

9 April, 2008

45 Minutes
2 chairs
3 lights
2 Q-tips
2 pair tweezers
1 pair nail clippers
1 razor (for desperation, unused)
1 dab bacitracin ointment
1 fabric band-aid

all for 1 tiny sliver of wood

that I just removed from the sole of my foot.

Posted by mdh
Filed in Uncategorized

14 Responses to “Sweet Relief”

  1. Lefty said:
    9 April, 2008 at 10:59 am

    I can only imagine that there was also some subplot involving Moss and a hugely embarrassing problem with the e-mail server. You should’ve called 0118 999 881 999 119 725 3.

  2. mdhatter said:
    9 April, 2008 at 12:43 pm

    I know you didn’t even look that up.

  3. Snag said:
    9 April, 2008 at 10:06 pm

    A large hacksaw would have also worked.

  4. mdhatter said:
    10 April, 2008 at 11:33 am

    I was nearly there, Snag. Nearly there.

  5. Kathleen said:
    12 April, 2008 at 5:07 pm

    doh. Sorry - I’ve been there before. It usually ends up with me convincing myself that I have Parkinson’s and having to be talking down.

  6. Kathleen said:
    12 April, 2008 at 5:08 pm

    “talked down”

  7. Lefty said:
    12 April, 2008 at 6:35 pm

    If you don’t stop talking down to me, I’m going to hacksaw my foot off!

  8. mdhatter said:
    12 April, 2008 at 7:04 pm

    I’ll bet you don’t even know how to use a hacksaw.

  9. billy pilgrim said:
    13 April, 2008 at 10:43 pm

    I won’t even mention the time I stepped on a 1 1/2″ nail on a jobsite, driving it completely through my shoe and into the ball of my foot, effectively nailing my shoe on!

    I had to sit down on the sidewalk and PULL THE NAIL OUT OF MY FOOT MYSELF…

    …but I won’t mention that.

    Felt weird though.

  10. fish said:
    14 April, 2008 at 11:22 am

    Is it true that he actually nailed your head to the table?

  11. billy pilgrim said:
    14 April, 2008 at 11:39 am

    Well he did do that, yeah. He was a hard man. Vicious but fair

    Well he had to, didn’t he? I mean there was nothing else he could do, be fair. I had transgressed the unwritten law.

    ….after that I used to go round his flat every Sunday lunchtime to apologise and we’d shake hands and then he’d nail my head to the floor. Once, one Sunday I told him my parents were coming round to tea and would he mind very much not nailing my head that week and he agreed and just screwed my pelvis to a cake stand.

  12. Adorable Girlfriend said:
    14 April, 2008 at 11:44 pm

    Ouch. I hate when that happens. That’s why you have to buy plastic.

  13. Jennifer said:
    15 April, 2008 at 11:04 am

    I think Snag would have just gnawed his foot off, to hell with the hacksaw.

  14. Lefty said:
    16 April, 2008 at 7:33 pm

    Ah, the proverbial “coyote ten”.

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